Get Rid Of Resentments Quickly In Recovery: They Are LIke Poison Brewing Inside You
Resentments in recovery, and in life in general, are like poison. We become angry with someone or our families and the anger grows inside of us. This anger takes the focus off of our enjoyment of life and recovery.. It rises up in us and can become a time bomb if nothing is done.
The 12-step programs have solutions to the resentments we hold onto for the many reasons we do. The only problem I have with it is that it is not until steps 4, through 9 that we begin to do something about our resentments. I strongly feel that some work should be done before that. Some people are not ready to look inside themselves and begin a moral inventory.
I was fortunate enough to have a trauma therapist that assisted me with my resentments. I had to write down all of the people or things I was angry at and held resentments against. This serves several purposes. First writing any emotions down is therapeutic and can help you identify your emotions and the sources of them. Next it can help a therapist or sponsor understand where our pain is coming from, at least in some part and in this situation, where our resentments are stemming from.
After creating the list, the therapist can then begin to notice themes and clusters around certain people, places and things in the person’s life. This can be like a road map to begin the healing process and begin to release the resentments that can fester and grow within us. If we do not deal with our anger, it will grow and we can leave ourselves open to many things and none of them good, one of them a relapse.
Grab a pen and paper and just begin writing down things that piss you off. That’s how I started. It is not something that will be finished in a day, you must continue to add to it whenever you think about someone or something that upsets you. It can greatly increase your chances in moving on through recovery with a little less emotional baggage.
- Resentment to forgiveness: a paradigm shift (whysoangry.ca)
- “Anger” (psactampa.wordpress.com)
- Forgiveness, Gratitude and Attitude (jgowen77.wordpress.com)
- “Forgive them, even if they’re not sorry.” (zumbadayz.wordpress.com)
- Family Resentment – How to Let Go When They Can’t (onceanaddict.org)